Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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