if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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