so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
