I think im going to throw up on grandma
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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