My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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