i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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