i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize