you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize