Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
