My nipple is on Facebook.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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