But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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