It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize