we have officially lost it.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
