He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
His nipple licking is glorious
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