The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
