the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
