I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
