Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
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