her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
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