I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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