So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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