are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I am spending my child support on dildos
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
