I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
