do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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