You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
