I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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