Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
