there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize
