Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
