Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Randomize
