Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I wish you could order shots online.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
