Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
