i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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