whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
