the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
