At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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