Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
