ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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