the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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