he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
