The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
