well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize