Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
