please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
