my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
