made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Randomize
