I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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