So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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