he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Randomize