When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
